There are a few relationships that are always frowned upon or considered to be forbidden. One of such relationships is falling in love with your colleague. We all have known and advised about “How not dip your pen into the company’s ink” or “Fishing off the company’s pier”. But you can’t control with whom you fall in love, of course, you can control you want to act on your feelings or not.
Falling in love with a coworker is more common than you think, you spend more time with colleagues than your friends and family. It’s easier to know about a person while working with them, rather than meeting them on dates or parties.
Recent Research shows, 89% of people felt attracted to a co-worker, and 58% of people dated a co-worker. Not all the office romance ended up successful, but in this article, I am not discussing infatuation or a crush, it’s about someone who is looking for a long-term relationship with your co-worker. However, you can always brush off feelings because of all the risks involved with workplace romance.
Office romance can be toxic and complicated. Here are a few tips you should do to make your workplace love innocuous:
1. Respect Boundaries:
If you are in love with your co-worker/ boss/ employee, you have to make sure that you know to treat each other professionally, no matter if other’s know about your relationship or not. Taking each other for granted at the workplace is the major cause of break-up at the workplace.
You have to respect boundaries and hierarchy in the office. No matter who is the dominating one in both of you but at the workplace, you have to make sure that you follow the chain of commands from the superiors and don’t use the advantage of being in a relationship with your manager, CEO, etc. It might be having a promotion, taking a leave, or playing favorites with each other. If you can’t set the right boundaries, you might face negative repercussions both at the personal as well as the professional end.
To Sum Up, as soon as you walk into the office forget about being in love and treat your BAE as a coworker.
2. Stay Emotionally Strong:
As I mentioned earlier, this article is for people who are looking for a long-term relationship and not a secret “behind the closed–door” relationship. If you are in a committed workplace relationship, then it’s obvious that others will gossip about you or try to create conflict between you and your partner. In such situations, you have to make sure that you do understand the situation first and later calmly discuss it with your partner.
In any relationship getting jealous or misunderstanding is inevitable, but how you overcome those hurdles is most important.
For instance, you saw your partner promoting someone else over you or having a long meeting with some other opposite-sex employee then it’s important to have trust without taking it personally.
3. Body Language:
Can’t keep your hands-off from your partner? You have to, if you are having an affair with your colleague. Those intense eye contacts, quick glances, holding hands, cute touches during coffee and lunch breaks are Big No at the workplace. Body language reveals a lot about your feelings, desires, and intentions. Even if you are not talking much with your partner, but your body language might make others uncomfortable. Thus, avoid those flirty looks and PDA to preserve both your business reputation and your relationship.
4. Give Space:
Giving space in any relationship is important and when we are talking about a relationship where both persons are working together, it’s really important to give some space to each other. You need to be understanding if your partner needs some alone time with friends, a night out, or quality family time. Try to schedule quality time with each other in advance so that you can balance love and social time effectively. Having a hobby, spending time with your friends should not end up in guilt feeling. Don’t hide about your activities with your partner, but do spend some time apart with each other instead of being too clingy.
5. The Worst… Breakup:
Workplace love might come with rules and responsibilities but it’s worst to handle breakups. Navigating from love to breakup can be tricky, and if it’s an ugly breakup then staying calm in front of each other. You don’t want to jeopardize your reputation in the office. Never share vent your feelings about breakup or love secrets with other co-workers. Changing the mindset and hiding the feelings of either hurt or hope to get your partner back need lots of strength and patience. A single wrong step or comment might stir up drama and might impact your career.
If you are looking forward to having a healthy love relationship with your colleague, then discuss all tarnishing consequences with your partner. Different companies have different approaches when it comes to office romance. They have to consider that personal relationships are not affecting the office environment due to abuse of power, discrimination, harassment, etc. Thus, once you both are mentally prepared and on the same page, it’s better to get the confidence of your supervisor or HR beforehand.
If you ever dived into an office romance, don’t forget to share your tips and experience with us.