Why Do We Miss Someone?

Why Do We Miss Someone?

We always wonder that when we miss someone, is it because we love that person, we like that person or maybe it’s just an infatuation?  We keep on fighting with ourselves that what’s the reason for missing that person? Some time we also miss people we hate. Many times we also miss people we fight all the time but when they are not around.

But, when you want to continue relationship with the person you keep on missing, you need to be clear with your intention. According to me there might be following reasons:

  • You also miss someone special when you are in love with that person
  • It might be infatuation ( just for a few days ).
  • You respect her/his qualities.
  • That person is always with you when you need someone to lean on.

Miss Someone

Whatever may be the reason, I would say it’s a very nice feeling to miss someone. You keep on thinking about that person whole day and night or if it’s worst you might start imagining him/her near you.

Many people feel that it’s the worst feeling to miss someone, but I totally disagree with this. I feel it’s the sweet pain and you can for sure enjoy missing someone. The only thing you need to remember is that you have to miss the golden moment you spend with each other. Please don’t ever miss bad times you spend with that person. Always try to cherish the good moments and it will surely bring a smile on your face.

Another thing which people do is to hide their feelings in front of person they are missing. You must keep your ego aside and convey your feelings to that person. Life is too short; if you love or you miss someone do let them know. If that person understands you, it would never ruin your relationship.

Love is missing someone whenever you’re apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you’re close in heart.  ~Kay Knudsen

What do you do, when you miss someone?

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Hey fellas, I'm Ruchi, and I blog about various relationships advice and problems, that I see in my day-to-day life. Check out my archive...

{ 184 comments… add one }

  • maria October 14, 2013, 5:59 am

    i cant miss someone because that person does not want to be with me. that is the worst. if i come forward then i will get hurt. so how to stop this?

  • Nitin October 26, 2013, 3:00 pm

    I am feeling really helpless. I love a girl. I told her that I love her but she refused. But I still miss her really badly. I miss her every second of my life. I understand that if I love someone, she may not feel same for me. But somewhere there is a negative feeling of inferiority. I want to forget her but I really feel helpless. I try to focus on my hobby and on my work but still i miss her. She is in my friend list on social networking sites. I have not logged on social networking site for long time but could not get her out of my heart. I dont want to delete her from my friend list.
    The worse thing is, I am unable to focus on my work. The harder I try, the more I fail. I want to fall in love with someone who loves me but I really don’t feel same for any other girl. I tried to be friend with other girls but I really miss her and dont feel same for any girl. I never want to fall in love. But today i want to get out of this but unable to. I really do not know what should I do. Because of this i am unable to focus on my work. There is rather more irritation because people are growing in their career but i am unable to focus on my work.
    Also, There is lot of anxiety, if she marries tomm. and if her husband is much better than me and if she will love her husband ..
    I dont know why I cannot stop missing her. Neither I cannot focus on my job so that I can get in better position in job, so that I don’t feel inferior to be a friend with her forever. I don’t know what should I do.

  • Mirsad November 21, 2013, 4:06 pm

    I broke up with her before 4 month ago. In the beginning after we broke up i felt bad, but i accepted my situation and I’ve tried to move on because it is a only thing we can do. I think that it’s just a short period of time, and when i find a other girl i will stop thinking about a girl who I’ve been broke up with. But she was always somewhere in my mind, my head or in my heart. I can’t really define my feelings, is it love or i just like her, or i just miss beautiful moments i had with her. Now after four months im single again. Other girl with whom i have been with couldn’t help me to get other thoughts. I broke up with her before one month a go.
    And now I’m thinking about a girl who i miss. I can still se in my thoughts a train, how it moves toward a train station, where i was waiting for her and i se her in that train, in the window how she smiles to me. I really miss her.

  • SidMissingBili December 2, 2013, 11:47 pm

    i miss my bili…not that she was actual bili,she is a girl,i call her bili :) we had relation of one year,and from 2 years im missing her,she cant fade away from my heart,her thoughts does creat some problems in my life now,from 2 years,haaaa.. I wish she could come up infront of me and tell me that she loves me still..i know thats not possible,she dnt love or she cnt love me she is inlove with some one else..but still i dont what keeps me bound with her..i do love her,i confess that..but she will not come that too i know still i wait for her… Or waiting for her from 2 years…

  • S812 December 11, 2013, 1:18 pm

    ok, so throwing for a loop here. I have a kind of on and off problem that i wish would go away, adapting to change when a very close friend of yours has a boyfriend and you fear that you are going to be distant eventually when it comes to making plans to hanging out. We talk on the phone pretty much everyday like always, but her and her bf tend to hang out almost everyday now and i feel like i have to take a backseat. I know this is mainly a part of life and everyone does it, shes my best friend in the world and even though i feel like i share a connection with her like no one else, she will never see or feel how i do about things in our friendship.
    So, yes i have at one point shared in the past i am attracted to her and always will be, but our friendship is going no further then being sisters. Throughout reading this, dont assume i am a jealous best friend, yes i have my bitter moments but in the end i will always be happy for anyone else that is happy, as long as they are doing the right thing. my feelings still go up and down continuously like a rollercoaster and i try so hard to protect myself, but with a strong friendship like ours I cant. I feel like i should back off for a while just to help myself stay happy.
    I know if i do this i will feel a little relieved but at the same time still miss her so much. Plus real friends shouldnt have to back off from each other like that. With being single for two years its not easy to not try hard to find a significant other and i guess the same time since she makes me feel like a better person and always lets me be myself, its hard to not be attracted. I’m in a slump and have to hide my emotions a lot no matter how much i make things obvious. I’m too good of a friend to step in the way of anything. Any words of advice? feel free to share. Much love, thanks.

  • prashant December 27, 2013, 2:48 pm

    heyy hiiii……..
    I love her so much and missing her a lot ,she told me that she is also loving me so much but she never express her felling towards me she told me that you should deserve a better girl than me she always said that,she said that she wanted to meet me after 5 years coz she wants to do something in her life she even don’t talk to me
    but sometimes she calls me but a very little i’m very upset in her absence why did she wanted to do i’m totally confused. If she had any problem she can told me but she didn’t i thought that there is any problem in me that’s why she doing this….
    don’t know what to do ??????? :(

  • Kyle February 21, 2014, 12:52 am

    Missing someone can be a pain… especially after 2 years!
    This girl I miss kept asking to be friends, then making no effort to be friends, and treated me like I wasn’t worth the time of day. I told her where to go after she didn’t even bother with me over Christmas/New Year… some friend, huh?
    But now, for some reason, I miss her all the time.
    I saw her a month back looking directly at me looking miserable, didn’t go talk to her though… if she wanted to talk, I’d listen but I feel like this is not a two way street. I don’t owe her the first move.
    I’m a whole different, better person than I was two years ago, and it feels like they’re left over feelings from the chump I used to be. I’m making something of my life and feel my own worth, unlike back then, but still feel pain at the idea that she won’t ever be in my life again…

  • Sam February 25, 2014, 8:53 am

    I love a girl from Australia, when she lived in Ireland we had a love/hate relationship for 3 years. We fought a lot, but we had the most random moments. She was my first love. After 5 years I went out with two girls, who didn’t come close to making me laugh like she did. So recently went to see her and my feelings haven’t changed. But she kept calling me buddy, an I thought she didn’t have feelings for me.. also she went to see her ex one night, so like all Irish men I got the drink into me, and went to the bar where she worked. I kept sinking shots into me, enjoying a holiday after all why not. Then some guy an a couple of girls were like come back with us, I was hesitant but I did go back, the girl kissed me outside the bar an we all jumped in a taxi. Then I went back to a house party an thought oh no what have I done, so I pretended I was a closet homosexual and didn’t sleep or touch anyone. So the next day I woke up to find kids jumping all over me calling me a leprechaun, and I give them my pot’a gold (dollar coins) to point me in the direction of where to get home. So I went back, an she give me a bit of stick, like she didn’t care, but after that we did sleep together an her feelings grew strong, as mine did also. Then she asked me around a week later if anything happened that night at the bar, and I swore nothing did… I couldn’t jeprodize a kiss for what we had… yep I’m a plonker! But we went on an lay under the stars on my last night and laughed till the sun came up. Then we cried are eyes out an she said that’s it, I’m coming to Ireland to see you. So we started saving an talking every night, and things went so well. Then the girl that kiss me, came into the bar when she was working and was asked if anything happened. She replied yeah we kissed. So I got a text ending it all, I apologized for lying, and crushing us. So I tried so hard to pick myself up, but that’s far from what’s happened, I’ve lost my job, I’ll eat a potato or an orange in a day, I dream about her when I sleep an then wake up an stay awake an think of her. I can’t talk to anyone because they say things that don’t help. I just want her to understand that I I’m a trusting loyal man I will love her the rest of my life. She is my first love, and only. I have wrote a letter and if I get nothing back, I really don’t know how to fix myself. Everyone i know is settling down and having kids, they don’t understand because when they leave I’m still here, dwelling and thinking of the hurt I’ve caused. I don’t think anyone can fix this but her.

  • yoga March 26, 2014, 8:23 pm

    Hie…this is yoga..F.age 18 …..at the age of 18 when we love someone …people say. Its not love its infatuation…..but i dont think it is….i loved a guy we were in a long distance relationship..we broke due to some personal reasons..now it has been 3 years i still miss him i care for him….i remember all those good and bad times we had spent with each other…and suddenly when i stop thinking….he comes back and chats with me …..till the time he starts feeling helpless that we cant be together….and then all of a sudden vanishes from my contact….whats ds..??…then i become helpless too…i know its very stupid…when u know something which is never gonna happen again..why do u still remember those memories and think why are we not together.?…i noe he still loves me and sometimes i feel i still love him too…he wants me back mam…he has confssed it too but what about those things which he had done to me….i am confused i reli dont want him….but he has become my weak point and i wanna overcome my fear my weakness…. what should i do.??…sometimes we know evrythng like whats good ,what is bad for us….but still we just cant do nythng about it….:(

  • Shubhi May 3, 2014, 2:49 pm

    Yep….v tru lines….

  • pheaqah May 7, 2014, 3:46 pm

    hello .. I really miss someone that I met for the first time .. he was a dentist .. he really took care about me .. everytime I miss the last moment we’re together .. he always make joke n keep make me laugh with his funny joke .. is it he love me or just want to be friend with me ?? I’m confuse rigth niw and need your advice .. TQ ..

    • Ruchi May 8, 2014, 8:03 pm

      Hey Pheaqah,
      He might be just caring and friendly person. Wait for few more clues like his body language or he ask you to spend more time with him. If he is in love he will surely give you hints. And if you can’t wait, just go and ask. Make sure you ask normally while you are talking to him and if he just want to keep you in friend zone then don’t get pushy and try to stay normal.

  • lisa May 22, 2014, 11:11 pm

    I do miss this guy..I don’t know why..he’s the first person I think about, when I wake up..n the last person I think about before I go to bed..I get butterflies in my stomach..my heart races..I do see him..n I tell him i miss him..he says the same..I’m scared if I tell him I love him,,will I run him away?? Hate to seem so forward..advice plz..

  • abhishek naik September 7, 2014, 7:28 pm

    well said Ashish…………my feelings are exactly the same . it is both pain and happiness . yes it can happen in the initial phases when nothing has happened and still many things to be unfold .

  • Choco September 9, 2014, 8:36 pm

    Recently, I started notice this guy. Its about a month. He is somewhere very near me because we works on the same level in the shopping mall. Every time he walk past my workplace, I will glance at him. One day, he finally looked at me and he smiled to me. I was overjoyed. After that day, every time he walk past we will wave to each other, smile or say hello. One day, my colleague decided to help me ask for his contacts. And he really give it to us. He also knows that actually I am the one who wanted his contacts and not my colleague. We chatted on the Facebook very often about personal dreams, life, work.. everything except relationship matters, even up to midnight time. However, i didn’t mention that he currently has a girlfriend. I wanted to tell him so much that I like him since the beginning.. I wanted to tell him I miss him many times I am tempted to message him but I endure it and hold on.
    Do you think he knows that I like him? What should I do? I miss him so much……

    • Ruchi October 1, 2014, 12:09 pm

      Hey Choco,
      Chill!! I guess he likes you. So, tell him about your feelings. Hope for the best, may be he is into you and prepare for worst, he might say no. If you would be scared and won’t tell your feelings, you might regret it later. Go ahead. Best luck :)

  • Unpredictable life September 11, 2014, 12:59 pm

    Hi ruchi mam,i dnt knw u,but
    I just neede very urgent help
    M unable to control myself
    Plz,plz,Plz do rply me some one as soon as possible,
    I miss my friend,i am of 21 and she is of 26,
    I cant express evrything in words,some things r just un explainable for me
    We met in group of social activities,slowly we carried very deep n strong bonding in frndship
    We both shared our sorrws
    We talkd 2-3 hrs daily,we chat daily like anything,
    Her life was too upset,she hared her each n evry secret wid me as small brother,she had bro n sis but still she shared evrythng to me
    We fight almost evry alternate day,many time serious fights,but nthng seprated us.
    We both wer so cloese just like we know each other since decades,i knw her nature,her past herse’f her thinking verywell,n even i guess no one can take care of me as she took n no one can be attached me as her,i think of her each sec,n coz of her sorrows we r just emotionally attached with each other,she was just like a god gift to me,n i guess no other girl can treat me as her,even a day if we didnt talkd it was uncomfartable for us,n i just think is she ok,i saved her each n evry chats,we bonded as we know from childhood,she is the only frnd of my life so close,but now she is engaged,busy,n bounded with some limits…she was n she is my priority at top,n i was also,but now,m at very low prioroty to her,practically i knw evrythng,but my mind n heart cant bare this,were we talkd daily 2-3 hrs,now only 2-3 mins in 3 days,she,no chats,nothng,..i miss everythng.i die to c my screen blinkng wid her name as calling,even being online we cant chat,not more then how r u.its uneasy n very tough for me to control my self,
    I want evrything back,that talks,i wana hug her tightly but nthng is posible now,i pray hard fo her happiness but i m killied when i realize that m not her priority as before,she smiles but m not reason behind it any more,i cant concentrateon anythng,m very sensitive n my heart just cant stop paining,cryng alot,i just need her,i remember each n every moment we shared,just dying to talk to her,m totally alone,n i guess m lost,i want things which r not possible,still cant stop expectations n thoughts,we wer very similiar at nature n evythng,i did a lot for her,but now evrythng came to an end,n this change is killing me.N ther is no one who can understand me as she did,n i cant leave her coz she wont be able to bare it,she is hapy,so cant disturb her,m just blanck,what to do,some time i just think why we met,life was diff if we didnt met,now i am very habbitual to her n want her,but i m totally alone,just cants stop cryng n my brain nevr stops to rembring her,i just want to del my memories,or it will kill me,we shrd smal to big each n evrythng,but today she left me alone n ders noone to listen me.its just much more then i described ,need some help n advice.

    • Ruchi October 1, 2014, 12:33 pm

      Hey Sohil,

      You need to understand, few people come in your life, make you feel on the top of the world and leave. Bitter truth but it’s life. You can’t force anything or anyone. Life changes and you have to be strong to move on. She is committed to someone else now and seems happy in her own world, so stop bothering her.

      You really can’t force things to happen. You will only drive yourself crazy trying. At some point you have to let go and let what’s meant to be.

      There are a few articles on this blog which will help you to forget her and move on. Unless you make your mind that you have to press restart button in your life and start concentrating on other things in life, no one can help you.

      Everyone will give you advice but you need to take action. Keep yourself busy in your work, do something creative, follow your passion and try to help others. It will help you.

      • mansoor ali December 14, 2014, 7:16 pm

        Today I told to my teacher I miss u ……in return she scolded me…now I m totally confused…..

  • Rachel November 4, 2014, 9:32 am

    Miss my BF he is back home and I’m In US I really miss him so much but I don’t think we gonna make it to be together!

  • unberncheber standeziet November 20, 2014, 7:55 pm

    Hey guys
    I m in the same path where u all r in
    Even i have posted before my problem..but today when i saw ur all i realized this is the same problem with everyone in this world
    I m almost not alive m just breathing coz due to some reasons since many long time
    A fight between me n my frnd carried so deep that today
    We r not talking since so many days nor even single text..m feeling like hell cant eat cant sleep cant concentrate on any thing…she was n she is everything for me..more then my gf,but i am nothing today for her…there was not a day we didnt talk n today its just like we even dnt remember when last we talkd n i cant accept this change
    But she is happy n even dnt realize any thing n dont miss me n dsnt care for it any more
    I did everything more then i can for her…but now dead..i m just lost
    Just cry cry cry…and queation that y we met..

    I just wanna thank u all who posted here there problems n situations coz of which i realized that i am not alone to be alone…definately we all r missing that our one speciall frnd…but here u me n evryone r just a strangers frnds…
    I just want to thank each n everyone who posted here…coz of u all i feel m not alone at all..
    Surely it will not stop my tears but for while it will make me realize that i have a huge bunch of unkown freinds..help me if u can n plz b always there when i need…
    I guess sharing is best medecine to heal our injuries of heart so if any one wanna share some thing here or with me u r most welcome coz v all r walking on same road of deep lonliness…may god bless u all n give super strenght to face this all…

  • john December 6, 2014, 9:20 am

    Dear Ruchi
    i have a dilemma – i love my girl every much and miss here a lot.. one day she says i dont miss you and and why should i miss you… this troubled me…is that when in love we miss that person or not?…your article helped to strengthen me i showed her your work. Kindly you can address me more.


  • ruchi January 10, 2015, 5:07 pm

    If you dont like someone why you miss that persone why???? And you never talk to him and you still misss him why why???????????????????
    And you never see him, nevrr talk to him but why he s still in your mind please please reply me please…….. ???”??????????????????

    • brown January 27, 2015, 3:52 pm

      He might feel the same way about you. Did you both shared some memorable moments when you are together? Maybe he is the one you are looking for a longtime coz you feel that he cares for you and like you maybe both of you found love and each of you will make both of you complete. Try to be close to him and communicate or date.

  • Aarzoo January 18, 2015, 10:46 pm

    Hi Ruchi!
    I’ve been in a relationship for 3 years and months with my boyfriend. We both were really happy and satisfied with each other. Due to some reason unfortunately I lost my trust, and he became so rude, harsh and ignoring towards me. And certainly he ended our relationship now. I just can’t stop missing him and the memories we spent together. We often had decided to get married next year but now everything is ruined. Please tell me what should I do while he doesn’t even want to listen me.

  • woodsman March 9, 2015, 6:55 pm

    I was dating a girl on and off for almost 3 years. We had a lot of good times together and made a lot of memories. We also had a lot of bad times. I broke up with her several times and got into other relationships. I seemed to have been searching for something and thought she wasn’t able to give it me so I would look for it in another relationship. I have learned the problem wasn’t her, it was me. I felt really bad for doing this and realized how much I missed her and loved her. After our last break which lasted about 2 months, I contacted her to make an amends and apologize for my actions, and we got back together. She had been doing really well in her life during the break and I really wasn’t. Since our reconnection, it has been rocky and she would often tell me she cant do this. All of her friends and family tell her to stay away from me. And so do mine for that matter. But I didn’t listen. Last Thursday she finally got angry enough and changed her phone number and asked me to not contact her at all. I haven’t contacted her since then, but everyday has been really hard. I feel that I have maybe done to much damage and I also feel unforgiven. I don’t know what to do. Even after different relationships, after months, I am having trouble of letting go. I feel stuck.

  • zahid March 12, 2015, 1:19 am

    Hii Aarzoo,sorry that u have not got the reply for your question, I can’t exactly says that my opinion will help u, but Inshaallah u will find something help full In this. The person who loves you should understand you in every situation, so what if u lost your trust on him, he must have understood that there may be a little mistake was his also that’s why the situation arrived. If he could have understood this he would have not changed his attitude toward u, Aarzoo the true love is that who understands you every time, not ignores the problem, he should at least try to understand the problem why it has arrived instead of ignoring it. Dear I would suggest you to say him sorry n move on from relationship, becoz it’s just 3 years, the person who can not understands u in just 3 years how will he takes the relationship til the last breath! Inshaallah u will not suffer! Ameen


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