So you met that cute guy in college, you both hit off like a house on fire, it was a very passionate affair, you used to love the way you guys used to sit holding hands on the last bench. You loved that little restaurant just a few miles far from your college and how you both used to be permanent customers there. Just seeing him used to free a thousand butterflies in your stomach.
But now he is doing all that to someone else, he is sitting on the last bench holding someone’s hand, you can never visit that little restaurant now, just seeing him with someone else kills you and brings a thousand tears in your eyes. You are not the only one. College dating usually ends up that way.
Talking to a lot of my friends I zeroed on a few reasons because of which college dating is not sustainable.
1. People evolve and mature as a person their demands and requirements out of a relationship also change:
This is a major reason. People do change a lot during this phase. A lot, mind you. You might love the way he shouted, you might find it cute sometime, but there is at no surety that you would love it forever. Earlier, just bike rides, stolen kisses, make outs on the empty staircases, saying ‘I love you’ a hundred times used to be your idea of a relationship but then it could also change to mature conversations, passion on bed, understanding the differences and having the one your soul yearns for.
2. They lack responsibility:
They don’t have that sense of responsibility. They don’t know what is the meaning of commitment. This is the time when the people haven’t grown up that much. They don’t know how important it is to be responsible. They don’t take it as a responsibility to keep their partner happy. For them, a football match might be more important than a sick girlfriend. Or the manicure at the parlor might be more important than teaching chemistry for a test to their boyfriend.
3. There are too many distractions:
Studies, friends, exams, scorecards, friends, late night parties, night outs, sneak-ins, hangouts, best friend’s boyfriends, best friend’s girlfriend, there are practically hell lot of things that occupy a college student’s mind and keep him/ her busy. Lots of things going in their heads which definitely deteriorates their partners ending things easily.
4. All they think about is themselves:
There is an inherent narcissism involved. All people care about is often themselves. They don’t care much about anything or anyone. The ones that they love the most is often themselves and just themselves. They don’t care about how something that is good for them might affect their partner in the worst way ever. All they want is happiness for themselves, no matter how much sadness it brings for their partner. This is a big flaw and needs to be taken care of.
5. Power games:
It is another integral reason. The ones who cares more in a relationship is often the one who gets royally screwed in the end. And this is what the college people believe in, they both try to be the one who cares less to gain power in the relationship. So these power games are also the integral relationship breakers.
6. Fake adults:
Even when the college goers try to act responsible, they aren’t able to. All they end up being is like fake adults. They try to be like adults, but they just aren’t able to be like them completely.
7. The two available ones aren’t wanted, the ones that are available are unwanted:
Mary is pretty but she is too approachable and too available but Katherine isn’t that, so the guy will seek Katherine. Same goes for the girls. We humans have this flaw, we just want the ones which are unget-table, and we don’t want the ones that we can have easily. This is how it is, and the result of all this game is a broken and miserable heart.
8. Looks are often the begin all and end all:
Yes, this is one very important factor. When we are in college, we tend to have a reputation, and that reputation even builds up more by having a super sexy girlfriend or a super hot boyfriend. They think that looks are the only thing that matters, and often they fail to see if the person can be compatible with them or not. They don’t think about anything else but looks. They should know that a fat and ugly girl with beautiful heart and amazing sense of humour is way better than a size zero with a beautiful face and zero IQ. Same goes for guys I would prefer a short, ugly and fair with a good heart, intelligent mind and superb sense of humour than a tall dark and handsome who cares about nothing but himself.
Remember, no matter how average a person might look, if he/ she has a good heart, it’s perfect.
9. They lack commitment:
They don’t know how important it is to fulfill promises and how important it is to fulfill the commitments that people make.
If you guys have any more reasons that could explain the failing of modern day relationships, kindly comment below and share your knowledge. Thanks for reading. Have a great day ahead.
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